These happy days are yours and mine

Scriven, landlord, narks, neeks and herbs, muthafuckas can't hold us down.
247 signing out, rolling the joints, kicking the kicks, bringing the bant.
There was this one day once when we made dinner and it was pretty nice, the other day we once went to walkabout and got beer and burger, one other time we were going to go to dq but we only went to sainsburys then we came back home and went to bed. When I'm old, when I'm 64 I'll remember those days.

247 is UNDER SIEGE

HELP! THE LANDLORD HAS GONE MAD! HE CAME ROUND SAID WE WERE FILTHY BEGGARS AND THAT WE HAD TO CLEAN UP! OR HE'LL TAKE US TO COURT! HELP!

Description of Landlord:

He had foaming teeth and a black heart. He had stripy trousers and was left handed. He had children's shoes on and he wore a hat made out of bones. If you see him, watch out. HE'S MAD!

If there are any soldiers out there who received this message, please send some jaffa cakes and diet caffeine free coke to 247 Crookesmoor Road in aid of the resistance effort. Any light music would be nice also, Toploader, The Corrs etc.

P.s. when sticking it to the man don't stick it to hard or you might get hurt, at all times be responsible, your safety comes first after all.

p.p.s. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pPo9ISQpzvM

Brown Sugar

Sometimes I'm just not so sure about it you know,

I love mummy

Matteo xx

CLEGG OR DIE

i love cleggg more than life itself, i'd take a bullet for that cheeky little walnut, but if i hear any of you so much as breathe a bad word about him i'll fucking nut you

Matteo x

i love mummy

film review: Schindler's LIST

MATTEO'S FILM REVIEW OF SCHINDLER'S LIST:

I quite liked it, but i thought it could have been a little bit longer,

Matteo xx

I Love Mummy

Leggings?

Is it cool for boys to wear leggins? I bought some but i'm scared to wear them out, i love mummy. MATTEO

The big one!

So.. as you may have noticed, the poll regarding Golden Balls' position in the Tv schedule has produced a fairly inconclusive result with a tie between "yes" and "don't be silly"! We decided to get the Carrotman himself to comment on the result:

247: so Jasper how do you feel about the result.

JC: well you know I love presenting Golden Balls, it's more than just a gameshow, it's a way of life. Personally I use the left over balls for all sorts of other functions... for example i use them as widgets in my homebrew beer - Carrot's premium ale. I also use them for rolling the dough in my homemade pies.

247: let us stop you there, so do you personally feel that GB should replace the news?

JC: Personally I feel that the mettle contestants must display when deciding whether or not to share or steal is far more relevant to the British public than any of the bullshit the news pumps into our homes.

247: ok.. so you think it should then..

JC: as a reader of daytime weekly, I have become aware of Jeremy Kyle's interest in the program and we currently have a proposal for a program based around a fusion of GB and the JK show. The idea being that disputes between members of the public are resolved via a game of Golden Balls in a stripped down version.

247: sounds interesting... well you heard it here first the Jeremy Balls show... coming to a television near you..

thanks Jasper

JC: peace up A-town